Monday, May 10, 2010

SAR #10130

What if it's not a recession and what if it's not over?

Chicken:  The EU and the IMF have tossed some €750 billion in the pot, challenging the speculators to put up or shut up.  “Money, it's a gas / Grab that cash with both hands / And make a stash ...”

Subtle:  BP's current plan to stop the oil leak is to force a bunch of junk into the well.  “It’s like plugging up a toilet,” Mr. Suttles said.

Silver Lining:  Federal agencies are conducting both civil and criminal investigations into JPMorgan Chase's “activities” in the precious metals markets both in London and New York.

Long May It Waive: Since the Deepwater Horizon rig exploded, the administration has granted at least 27 exemptions from doing in-depth environmental studies of oil exploration and production in the Gulf of Mexico, including a BP plan to drill in 4,000 feet of water and an Anadarko rig in 9,000 feet.

On Average:  So far this year the US has averaged one drone attack in Pakistan every 3 days, killing, on average, 7 people.  This weekend two missiles got 20, raising the average yield.

Inquiring Minds:  Can the Euro be saved? Probably not.

Simpleton Math:  The BLS reported a 290,000 gain in jobs in April, 60,000 of them temporary census workers, 180,000 of them imaginary birth/death statistical creations, and 50,000 new Wal-Mart greeters – which agrees with the ADP payroll data at 32,000 new jobs.  They also “adjusted” the January number from -20,000 to -2,840,000. Damned decimal points...

Insert Here:  Why was Twitch lying there ruining my Sunday breakfast?

Nose/Face:  Republicans are urging the US oppose an IMF bailout of any European country because “They're a bunch of socialist immigrants who want to come here and steal our healthcare.” Or something like that.

Good Question:  Why is it the government’s explicitly stated goal to get people to go in debt for cars they do not need (new, newer, newest!) and houses they cannot afford?  And then to fill the houses and garages and U-store 'ems with Chinese stuff.  Qui bono?

Cliff Note:  Petroleum supply and demand are likely to converge by 2015. Explicate.

Cow/Cabbage:  'First the banks failed, forcing states to carry out rescue operations.  They plunged the global economy over the precipice and we had to launch recovery packages, which increased our debts, and now they are speculating against these debts.”

And The Real Reason Is?  Senate Republicans are determined to block Obama's nominee to be ambassador to El Salvador because she used to date this guy....

Stockholm Syndrome:  Payday lenders are conning their victims into protesting government regulation of these usurers on the grounds that  “If we don't act today, Congress will create a new agency and a government takeover of your personal finances.  This new agency would have the power to regulate and restrict your personal credit options."  Namely it won't let these vermin charge the unwary 180% interest rates.

Omen:  California may be having some budgetary shortfalls, but Illinois needs to find $13 billion – equal to half the state's general fund budget. Which half of the state's services and support will go away, schools or jails?

1 comment:

kwark said...

"RE: And The Real Reason Is?" Typical Republican leadership. When they take time off from trying to transfer yet more cash to the top 1% they're playing stupid games like this. Well, to be fair, most of the Democrats appear to be firmly in the same pocket as the Repubs when it comes to wealth transfer (talk about Socialism!). And thanks be, a sizable percentage of Americans (not receiving the cash by the way) think this is great. Tea Party on!