SAR #8323

The USA, a subsidiary of Paulson, Bernanke & Associates

Rush to Do Nothing: Democrats are still afraid of the GOP. Why not force a Yes/No vote on the auto industry? Never mind the merits of the case - that's not the point. Getting the GOP on record is the point. On record as being against the working man, against American Industry, the flag and apple pie? Wimps. It would be interesting to live in a two-party state.

Fair Deal: GM they can have the $50 billion (a) if they can identify at least 10 million customers who can actually afford to buy all those new cars without starting a new credit bubble, or (b) if they use it to rebuild the national mass transit systems they and their friends in the oil business purposely ruined 80 years ago. Make that $100 billion.

No-Brainer: Faced with foregoing their bonuses, Citibank's top executives decided to fire 50,000 employees instead.

Buy the Numbers: Consumer durable goods (appliances, carpets, stoves, furniture) output fell by 18% in October 2008 from the previous year. That's the 30th consecutive month. You want fries with that?

End Run: Claiming unspecified pipeline damage, Georgia has halted natural gas deliveries to South Ossetia. Suppose the US is behind this, too?

The Agency Problem: If I'm CFO and short my company's stock before issuing the quarterly report, I've been bad. If I hire you to do my books, see I'm failing and short me. you've been bad. If a bank gets private information from a customer and uses that information to trade at the expense of the customer's stockholders, it's (a) business as usual, (b) Goldman Sachs or (c) not yet proven.

Getting Back On: After every fall, my mother would tell me to climb back on the bike and try again. Barbara apparently told little Georgie the same thing about free market capitalism.

Futility, Defined: The governments of the world will gather in Copenhagen in December 2009 to negotiate a treaty spelling out what they may do to lower global greenhouse gas emission. Their decisions will be based on the 2007 ICPP report which was based on data published by mid-2005, which was based on research conducted in 2004.

While You Were Out: Just before the polls closed on election day, the Bushies in the Bureau of Land Management announced a December 19th (late on the Friday before Christmas) lease auction on 50,000 acres adjoining Arches, Dinosaur and Canyonlands National Parks. Easements to allow vacationers access to the parks will be maintained.

Parting Gifts: More than 2300 felons are seeking pardons from President Bush before he leaves office, not counting administration officials.

Multiples Choice: States, cities and Home Depot have applied for funding from the Treasury, along with about 6,000 banks. There's not going to be enough IOUs to go around and states and cities will eventually to go begging to Wall Street where they'll pay 18% for funds the banks are getting from the Fed at 2%. This is variously called Banking, Capitalism, Democracy or Theft. Chose one.

Work Visa: The Iraqi cabinet has agreed to let its US pupetmasters extend their all-expensive visit to the end of 2011. Apparently, no one thought to ask Moqtada al-Sadr.

I'd Rather Not: Remember thinking CBS was giving in to the White House when Dan Rather got fired for telling the truth about the emperor's old uniform? Seems Dan has not gone quietly and has used his investigative reporting skills to show how clever you were.

Porn O'Graph: Mirror, Mirror, Oil and Dollar.